roasted pistachio chocolate bars

it's possible that after this weekend i have plumb turned into a dumpling! i can't be certain, i'm afraid to look in a mirror 😬  you would be too if you ate a pile of potstickers and steamed buns the size of an eight-year-old. oof da! obviously it was all worth it in the name of reenacting our annual dumplings of the world chrismukkah party for #mollyontherange, and do you know what this means now??? we can finally take down our chrismukkah bush. happy spring! 

book shooting is almost dunzo, mum and marshy are up here assisting, and this time next week i will be on my way to hawaii with lily, steph, and alana. i am last-day-of-school excited. nay, i am first-day-of-camp excited. i've never ever been to hawaii, and every time i tell somebody that i'm going, their eyes roll straight to the back of their heads, their voice alters in pitch, and they say something to the effect of hawaaaaiiii is uhhhmazzzzing. so, i'm really excited to join the enlightened group of *people who have been to hawaii*, and i'm extra excited that it will be with three of my very favorite lady humans!

i do have some questions though. maybe you can help me? most of these are probably googleable, but allow me to think out loud:

what is the time change? will it be such that i will wake up easily with the sun and have a pleasant few moments of quiet instagram time before my west coast sisters appear? or will it be the type of thing where i will want to pass out at 3pm and eat breakfast toast at 11pm?

will a ukelele be playing at all times? (kind of like vienna and their waltzes?)

do i get a lei when i step off the plane?

will my cell phone work?

how tasty is spam???????

is my aversion to bananas going to be an issue? 

what sorts of wild animals run about? are their squirrels? wild turkeys? aardvarks?

i think those are all of my questions.

to celebrate our lift off, we're posting travel snackees today! steph's got spam and egg onigirazu, lily's got matcha cacao truffles, alana's got furikake snack mix, and i've got these here pistachio chocolate bars! i found a massive stash of pistachios in my pantry because i am a nut hoarder. it's the type of situation where i love them so much but i'm afraid to use them because then i'll have used them all up. but finally i had to use them because otherwise they would have gone bad. so i ground them up into a chewy marzipan situation, dunked them in chocolate, and sprinkled them with all sorts of goodies like freeze dried strawberries, sprinkles, and this sesame/fennel/orange/ginger mixi am so excited to giggle on the plane and eat chocolate on the way to hawaii. yipee!

roasted pistachio chocolate bars

makes 8


1 1/2 cup roasted pistachios
1 cup powdered sugar
1 teaspoon almond extract
1/2 teaspoon rosewater, optional
1/4 teaspoon kosher salt (omit of pistachios are salted)
6 tablespoons light corn syrup

10 ounces dark chocolate

sprinkles, freeze dried fruit, or other toppings



In a food processor, blend the pistachios until they’re very finely ground. (Be careful not to over blend them or you will end up with pistachio butter.) Add the sugar, almond extract, rosewater (if using) and salt and pulse to combine. With the motor running, drizzle in the corn syrup and blend to form a dough. It may still look crumbly in the food processor, but if you squeeze it in your hand it should stick together. Turn the mixture out onto a work surface, roll it out about 1/2” thick, and cut out rectangles about 1 1/2” by 4”. Place the rectangles on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper and freeze for 15 minutes.

Melt the dark chocolate either in a double boiler on medium low or in a microwave oven, heating for 30-second increments, stirring after each, until it is smooth and melted. Remove it from heat and stir it until it is no longer hot to the touch. 

One by one, use two forks to lower the pistachio rectangles into the chocolate, flipping to fully coat. Allow excess chocolate to drip off and then place them back on the parchment. Top with sprinkles or other toppings, if using. Harden them in the refrigerator or at room temperature. Store in an airtight container in the refrigerator.