the sideburns are real,
my belly is full,
and come on, those bathrooms are not that confusing.
a very handsome human took me to wd~50 for my birthday. {is today your birthday?! said my poor mum that was amnesia-ridden for 24 hours* no, mum, it's an early present}
*true story. don't ask unless you have a cookie.
our reservation simply happened to be within the first few days of the new tasting menu. when i discovered this my initial sad eggs benedict-less reaction was masked by how much the 12-year-old in me loves being first in line. it was so new that a few little stumbles in the wine pairing led to extra boozies for us! oh man it was boozy. ok here are my pictures:
{1} like a little cloud of flavor, i conquered this fish. it was tasty enough and the texture was fleeting enough to make a fish lover from a h8er.
{2} my third time ever eating lobster and it was a charm! also, are grapes in style?
{3} mmm. phoking good. all dark and meaty and stuff.
{4} a yoke that has been cured in salt and sugar for six hours, it thickens. it is so cool! it makes slow poached as passé as gauchos.
{5} brotha had me at mustard biscuit. light and airy solid mustard. oh em jazzle. and that meat, it was soft and buttery. oh i did love this one.
{6} the crab was actually shredded, not with a little face :-(. i just wanted to draw a little face. this toast was really yummy, it was super sweet and refreshing.
{7} a baby fried green tomato! for joy. it was nice to have that comforting accompaniment to break my sole virginity. the flavors of this one, with the black licorice, made me feel really hip and highbrow.
{8} you know what sweetbreads are, right? uhh... they're-- shut up don't say it. i didn't finish this one.
{9} perhaps this was my favorite. jam and meat are probably one of the more powerful couples, flavor-wise. and anything with spaetzle is immediately my bff.
{10} ok, things got super boozy around this time and i recall thinking this would be a crème brûlée thing and then cracking open a shell and finding ice cream and handsome man saying "cuuuuucumber."
{11} what happens when dr. dufresne mates cotton candy with ice cream. 
{12} have you ever poked your finger into what you thought would be a warm and toasty marshmallow only to find that it is in fact ice cream? i highly recommend it. i also highly recommend bringing some black currant jam on your next camping trip.
not pictured: 
~the chocolate + gjetost raspberry thing. that sour cheesy after-dinner chocolate you always wanted.
~a tour of the kitchen
~wylie dufresne said happy birthday to me!!!!!
in the kitchen with my little birthday candle 
and a chocolate minty cake!


sometimes i avoid brunch like the plague because all it is is waiting on really long lines, for all the same pancake stuff, and i'm either hungover or full from last night's lucky burger or both. 
but none of those things are true when mum is here!
hi, mum! oh hi, justit!
for when mum is here, we wake up early to avoid the lines and go to badass places like
{and of course, we're not hungover because mums don't do that}
it was mum's idea because since she read blood, bones, and butter
she can't shut up about the gabrielle hamilton.
it was super delightfully tasty.
my favorites were the carbonara {for breakfast!!} and the dutch pancake {which was thick and sweet and doughy, like a real cake!} and the potatoes that came with my eggs were such a highbrow brilliant hash brown. 
nothing needed more salt or pepper or anything because it was all so flavorful and fantastic.
well, the bloody mary needed booze. but that's not their fault, it's new york state's fault whatever. 
and it ended so happily, with a revival of the lost art of after-dinner mints in the form of black licorice. which normally i would have left, but something came over me and i really enjoyed black licorice for i think the first time and it was such a peculiar yet fabulous way to end a yummy brunch.
if prune was a person, i think i'd totally want to be her friend because she'd probably be one of those that plans beautiful tea parties and wears great dresses but also has a potty mouth.

clinton street pancakes in my jammies

the cookbook section of the public library is my new favorite place.
you can go to shopsin's,
and noma*
without even having to shower or put your face on or wait!
and even better: yesterday i experienced clinton street baking company's
super famous & fluffy pancakes after a heavy night of drinking without the
risk of getting to the front of the line and having to emergency
run home to vom because i was already at home!!
how great is that.
also, seeing the recipe makes you think twice about eating the initial twelve that you'd like to, lest you consume all that butter. so you are killing two birds with one stone by being healthful and in your jammies!


*good friggen luck with that one. but will invite me over when you do?

is that a long-faced mickey mouse pancake, or are you just excited to see me?

week 30: xiao ye

if you're drunk and you're in harlem,
you go to lincoln fried chicken.
if you're drunk and you're on the upper west side,
you go to grey's papaya.
if you're drunk and you're in taiwan,
first of all,
call your mother. does she know you're there?
i'd imagine you'd eat something like the booty call food* at 
the soon-to-open
{from the punks that brought you baohaus}
*it's a technical term, coined by owner eddie

please enjoy these pretty pictures from this weekend's six-course preview love fest:
 concubine cucumbers
no,really, that's the name.
they're deliciously sweet and garlicky pickled cucumbers
with a touch of salt 
that i imagine give you way more joy than a concubine.
tofu bricks
and you will shit a brick, these are so good
if you made a marshmallow into a donut
and then extracted the part where marshmallows are a million times too sweet 
and then added chili sauce and peanuts and scallions
you'd get these.
and you'd never want to stop.
poontang potstickers
filled with pat lafrieda meat
a dumpling dressed up as fat bastard yelling at a mini me black label burger, saying 
"get in my belly!"
these are your wildest dreams come true.
summa the most outrageous dumplings you'll ever have.
in true pat lafrieda fashion, these melt-in-your-mouth puppies don't need any condiments.
just love.
all love.
taiwan most famous pork on rice
the filling of a barbecue pork bun, ground up
over rice
simple & comforting.
like your favorite hamburger helper on asian steroids.
hainan chicken
christmas-colored sauces
chicken flavored rice
odd. my grandma didn't tell me she got a job cooking at xiao ye...
sweet potato balls
fried sweet taters with sesame seeds
brown suga
sneakily disguised as red bean balls...
a wonderful, happy ending :-)


ahh the satisfaction.
i can't wait for this place to legit open.
i'm going to get, like, a trillion poontang potstickers.
it's going to be amazing.

22 restaurants to go.



xiao ye is on orchard and stanton 

p.s. am i naive for not knowing what "poontang" meant?
i googled it.
bad idea.