week 43: the token awful one

 it had to happen sometime, no?
i don't really want to talk about it.
because this is a happy blog, goddamnit. 
not a the-cheese-in-this-fritter-tastes-like-it-was-once-powdered blog.
and certainly not a hold-on-a-sec-while-i-scrape-away-all-of-the-fat-on-this-pukey-looking-pork-that-i'm-going-to-try-anyways-because-it-costs-half-my-rent blog.
molly is a sad sad queasy barfy panda :-[
the good that came spewing out of this situation {like projectile style} was a lovely hang with wonderful friends,
and the reaffirmed belief that the only foods that should ever be consumed on the upper west side are
and bagels
and pizza.
pray that i make up for this one in my remaining nine restaurants.



this restaurant has already been blocked out of my memory. don't ask me where it is or i'll hit you with the grumpy stick.

week 32: addis abeba

my knowledge of ethiopia is:

which is in fact no knowledge at all.

so i took it upon myself to learn more.

mum woke me up yesterday at the wee wee hour of noon and said,

if you're not ready in fifteen minutes to go eat ethiopian food with me and stoopie and marshy, you're starving.

here it is. 

addis abeba

evanston's finest ethiopian!

marshy and mum and stoop enjoying themselves.

i need to try it again when i haven't just gotten out of bed...


to go.



addis abeba

is on chicago ave in evanston.

around the corner from


's old apartment.

week 9: big pink

miami has three types of restaurants:

1. the kind that uses big boobies to attract customers
{such as... ALL of the restaurants on lincoln road}
2. little dives like la sandwicherie and el rey de las fritas that are a bit off the beaten path but worth it.
3. diners where the menus are the size of a four year old.

... and so when my best bribery efforts to get a ride to el rey failed,
saved me from having to endure big boobied hostesses.

the victims, left to right: 
sue, mark, brian, me, rob 
{five points if you guess which ones are related}

...it was your typical huge diner-y restaurant that apparently all of miami flocks to for sunday brunch,
and it has some quirky menu items,
such as a tv style dinner, complete with sectioned tray,
and various things served in buckets...

like the calamari and shrimp that i tried for the first time
and the calamari i kind of liked
and the shrimp made me want to puke my brains out.
{the men loved em though}

...so then our mains came.

and then about ten minutes later our silverware came.

like what?
rob wonders how he should eat his tuna sammich

brian showcases his lox pizza with caviar
which might as well have been a bagel & lox
too salty for brian's taste
a+ for creativity, i thought it was delightfully mediocre

when i couldn't decide what to get on the 4 foot by 4 foot menu,
mark told me to close my eyes and point at something,
and i got
the big pink hollywood breakfast
polenta fries topped with spinach, bacon, and poached eggs...
covered in cheese sauce
{cheese sauce on the side for me please, for the sake of my poor heart}

and i learned two things:

1. there's a reason polenta fries aren't more popular
2. having to watch your poor food lose heat while a sassy aloof waitress hunts down silverware is more painful than you will ever know. 

p.s. what self 'specting restaurant serves nacho cheese?

in the end,
sassy waitresses and the absence of silverware 
did not ruin the meal
us midwesterners were in the sun,
graced with people we love,
and enthralled in good conversation.

...43 to go...



big pink is located at 157 collins ave in miami

week 7: lederhosen

subtitle: your spätzle are rubber bands, so let's drown our sorrows.

one of my very best friends, rob, is a near-pescetarian. 
he's a vegetarian,
but he eats fish.
and the "near" part because,
one day a week,
he indulges in the land animal.

and so i knew we would be perfect valentines for each other when he professed his affection for me by saying,
"i'm saving my meat day for you, baybay"
that's true love, if you ask me. 

so, obviously, it was either burgers or schnitzels.
and it just so happened that i was due for a schnitzel.

and so the rob and i navigated about the tiny streets of the west village
until we happened upon
...hidden in a little basement of one of those beautiful west village townhousey things. 

it was so much like entering a german beer house,
that rob and i actually broke out in our best german talky
{we are, after all, scholars of the language}
we were immediately hushed up by our 
sassy "i left germany for a reason and don't want to sprechen the deutsch with you" waitress.

sure, frau, sure.

so i got:
chickens schnitzel
can you substitute that pickled stuff for more spätzle?

{clockwise from top: pickled shit that no one really eats anyways, 
rubber patty, 
rubber bands}

rob got:
pork schnitzel
a la holstein = with an egg on top
pickled shit

ditto on the rubber.

i'll spare you details,
but the evening was saved by four things:

1. the massive mural of pretty germany mountains,
complete with scaled down painting of neuschwanstein,
and cows.
2. the happiness and beer-garden-y ambiance that would make it a very pleasant place to trinken a bier with friends.
{a.k.a. i'd go back to this place, but only after dinner...}

3. my pretty jimmies heart that i crafted in my milk during dessert at milk & cookies.
4. rob {duh}

i mean,
a bad schnitzel had to happen sooner or later.
good thing i have 45 more restaurants to go!!



lederhosen is located at bleecker and grove in the west village.
milk & cookies is located at commerce and 7th ave in the west village.